I recently read two articles about the same thing but the take away from the articles were completely different. They were both about January 1 and the setting of New Year’s resolutions. Depending on my mood of the moment I could easily relate to either one.
First article talked about how we place so much importance on that first day of the year when we could place that level of importance on everyday to make each day count. The question was why wait until January 1st to start making a change in our lives and why do we put so much value on just the one day? Every day can be January first and all squares on the calendar are created equal. This is really powerful because we can just restart anytime we want to. Take a day, a week or even a month off isn’t the end of the world and you are not a failure for not following your resolutions if you choose to pick it back up. You don’t have to wait until a magic day, the first of the year, to make a resolution and work on it. You are not really behind because it’s a work in progress and you can always start back up.
Even as I write this though I feel my world shaded by the second article – the more negative article. The article about my ADHD self and the broken promises to myself. With ADHD it is so easy to make promises and goals and resolutions. The heart is there, the passion is there, the desire to finally stop being the messed-up procrastinating person that I am. Lofty goals and commitments to family, friends and co-workers makes every day feel like January 1. How many goals have I set and failed at? The promise to be good and the eventually backslide as the disorder presents itself.
I think the key is to set realistic goals, short term goals, and to be nice to myself. I may never write that book or become a dancer or become insanely popular with tons of friends but I do have good things going for me. Right now my plan is to take things one day at a time and one bite sized goal at a time.
Acceptance and the desire to do better. Knowing that I can’t get rid of my ADHD but can learn to work with it. The love of my husband and daughter. This is happiness.